A Gimungous, Hugantic Entry
Some of you have started to complain about the lack of new entries on weekends. While that is very flattering and I appreciate it, the only thing I can say is ... tough shit.
As much as I like you guys and as much fun as this is, writing a new blog entry is about 719th on my list of stuff to do between waking up on Friday and going to bed on Sunday.
Anyway, while I'm not going to be writing anything on the weekend anytime soon, I might try to make the Friday entries extra lengthy, just so you have more to read if you choose to stop by here during the weekend.
So, with that in mind, let's see how big this thing can get (which, incidentally, is something I may start saying to boys when they take their pants off in front of me for the first time) ...
First, let's get to some of the stuff you guys have left in the comments section lately, because that's my favorite part of this blog and I really wish more of you would comment every day.
Responding to what I wrote about male and female strippers, Nico said:
I'd have to choose male strippers over women as well. They seem to have so much fun doing what they do and the women are just so bloody boring. My friends and I went to one female strip club once. 5 girls in a row - 5!!!!! - did the exact same dance. The following week I went to the male strip club with a couple of my girls and each guy had a COMPLETELY different act. It was MUCH better than the girls. Tho it's nice to go see the girls every now and then.
Another thing I've noticed about male strippers is that they are allowed to do a lot more with the customers than female strippers are. Or at least the female strippers I've seen.
For instance, as far as I know, customers in female strip clubs aren't allowed to rub (finger, lick, whatever) a stripper's pussy. Meanwhile, customers in male strip clubs often touch the stripper's cock and I've even seen them go farther than that.
All of which probably goes back to what I said originally, which is that it seems like male strippers like their job and female strippers don't. In other words, male strippers are happy to have girls rubbing them all night long, whereas female strippers would probably prefer if the boys in the club didn't touch them at all.
Someone definitely needs to study this issue, because I think it shows a lot of the differences between the sexuality of men and women in general.
Responding to my lust for Michael Phelps, terrashmerra said:
one of my x-bf's and now current casual sex partner is a swimmer. it's hot and he's got great moves and this incredible stamina. so ashley, go find yourself a swimming man as fast as possible !
We have a big "aquatics center" at school and, once school starts up again in a few weeks, my plan is to go there and scout the talent. I may even run some sort of mini-Olympics of my own to determine the best boy for the job.
Some of the areas I'm thinking of testing in are tongue speed, cock size, ability to "reload" after an orgasm, durability, and all-around sexual flexibility.
I think I may call it "The First Annual Ashley Games." The winner, of course, gets a nice roll in the hay with me.
By the way, for the boys out there, you should all know that your stamina is very underrated as a skill. I've been with some boys who can't sustain a constant level of good, hard fucking for very long and it really is a letdown.
I'm not saying I need a boy who is a fucking machine or anything (although I'm not against the concept), but being able to go at a good, hard, fast pace for a few minutes straight is very important.
Responding to my entry from last week about me not liking my name all that much, Matt said:
They were talking on the radio this morning about names that if you hear them you assume the person is hot. Ashley was one of the few that they mentioned, and I agreed with them.
Embrace your name.
As I said before, when I think of Ashley, I think of a little girl. However, boys have been known to think little girls (not actual little girls, but, say, 20-year-olds who look like 16-year-olds) are very hot, so I guess that makes some sense.
It could be worse, I suppose. I mean, "Ashley" is an infinitely sexier name than "Marge" or "Gertie" or something, right?
Okay, enough with the comments. Now let's move along to some good stuff I saw on other blogs ...
Remember Nico, who made the comment above about strippers? Well, she has a blog of her own and she had an entry in response to my crush on Michael Phelps.
Basically, she agrees with me that Michael Phelps is beyond hot and is totally fuckable. Plus, she found an even sexier picture of Phelps than the one I posted.
Here it is (try not to drool) ...
Unless my eyes are playing tricks on me, I do believe Michael is packing some serious meat. He almost has to be, because I can't imagine god creating a body that great and attaching something little to it.
Meanwhile, Teyden over at The Truth Blog said some interesting things about boys not being sexy:
Sometimes I think this blog needs to relax. Sometimes I want to just ill it like That Ashley Girl. I could spend all day talking about sex and people I want to sex and people who I have sexed and how damn sexy I am. But really I'm not sexy. I'm a dude and dude's aren't sexy.
I mean, we can be handsome and maybe even attractive but not sexy. Sexy doesn't have a hairy ass. I am a guy and us guys have hairy asses. What could possibly be more disgusting than a hairy ass? I am so glad it's on the back side of my body because I would definitely have a serious break down if I had to look at it everyday.
And I'm sorry to all those girls out there who have to look at all us guys. Cause you all are so damn sexy. With your long hair and your shaved legs and shaved whatever else you have shaved (and if you haven't shaved or waxed anything else I really think you need to take a long look at yourself and come up with a good reason why you haven't).
What makes the world go round is the fact that men and women find different things sexy. I mean, if I found long hair, shaved legs and bald crotches sexy, I'd be a lesbian, right?
And while there are obviously a lot of girls out there who do find those things sexy, the majority of us are more into the stuff Teyden doesn't think is sexy. You know what though? It's okay that Teyden doesn't think a hairy ass is sexy, because otherwise he'd be into boys. See how that works?
Boys like soft, hairless bodies, so they try to fuck girls.
Girls like hard, hairy bodies, so we try to fuck boys.
Without those differences, we'd all die, because no one would be making babies. God might have fucked a lot of stuff up, but I think he got this part right on the money.
Okay, now let's finish up with a little celebrity gossip ...
A lot of people have been making fun of Tara Reid for getting breast implants recently. Well, okay, I guess I should back up for those of you who haven't seen anything about this. Basically, Tara Reid got really big boobs.
Here are some "Before" and "After" shots to compare ...
Personally, I would never get boob implants. On the other hand, I think I have really great boobs, so that has never been an issue for me. If I had really small boobs or really bad boobs, perhaps I'd feel differently about the whole thing.
That said, I do think it's kind of funny when a celebrity who has had her picture taken a million times and has even appeared naked in movies suddenly has boobs that are like three sizes bigger than they were last month.
If I were going to get a boob job, I don't think I'd go from A-cups to D-cups overnight. First of all, Tara Reid is a little, thin girl, does she really need gigantic, watermelon-sized tits?
Second of all, even if they looked good on Tara (which they don't, in my opinion), it's going to be hard for anyone to look at them and simply think they look sexy, as opposed to thinking, "Wow, Tara Reid got gigantic boob implants."
So, while I'm not putting Tara Reid down like so many other people are, I do think there's a certain aspect of what she did that is humorous. Still, I can absolutely understand why girls get boob jobs, because I really enjoy having nice tits and I can't imagine not having them.
In fact, one of my best friends is an extremely gorgeous girl with an amazing body, and she has tiny boobs. I know it is something that bothers her and it is always an issue for her. Sometimes she doesn't buy an outfit because she doesn't think it looks good without boobs, she is very self-conscious with her body, etc. I can honestly say I think she would be much happier if her boobs were just a little bit bigger.
Basically, I say congratulations to Tara Reid on the new boobs and good luck to any girls out there who are considering boob jobs. I really hope it makes you feel better about the way you look and I really hope it makes your life a little better too.
Just maybe think about going with something that matches the rest of your body at least a little bit. To me, at least, Tara Reid looked a lot sexier in the "Before" pictures than she does in the "After" pictures.